Wednesday, March 8

Change of heart

Don't be fooled by the title of today's post. I'm not suddenly switching to the reviews of cheesy game shows. I have always and will always review and appreciate cheesy reality shows. I could never betray them like that. What I mean by change of heart is that I might have spoken too soon about "The Real World: Key West." Are the characters essentially shallow and irritating?


That being said, there are rays of hope here and there. First of all, Jose is so freakin adorable! He is probably one of the nicest "Real World" housemates in the history of the show. Such a sweetheart. love Love LOVE him!

I actually really like Tyler too. Meet the essential caddy gay man of the group, but think Danny from "Real World: New Orleans" meets Dan from "Real World: Miami." He's lovable and fun, but sarcastic and bitchy at the same time. Last night's episode let on to some serious tension between him and "Slutlana" as he called her. It was remniscent of Dan and Melissa and I can only pray for another "Why'd you open my mail you stupid...," well you get the idea. I had no idea how funny Tyler was, though, so the show just got a little more interesting for me.

Paula still has issues and I wish she'd stop saying she hates being under a microscope. You are a LIAR Paula.

Example #1: you came on "The Real World." That's like 50 points right there.

Example #2: YOU are the one who brings up the issue of food all the time. When John's just trying to mind his business and eat a slice of pizza, you leaning over him and saying how jealous you are because you can't eat food like that isn't exactly a subtle way of letting him know you have an eating disorder.

Example #3: You're constantly crying and showing that the slightest deprivation of oxygen leads to a serious asthma attack.

Example #4: You're always in your bathing suit. We get it. You're skinny.

Example #5: You told Jose that he looks at you and thinks you're too skinny, but girls look at you and say 'I wish I looked like that.' Listen sweetie, I might be able to afford losing a few pounds, but I certainly do not want to look so emaciated that people around me fear for their lives that my collar bone might pop out at any second and poke their eyes out. Now THAT is sexy.

Those are just the first things that come to mind too. You are crying for help Paula so stop flipping out every time someone suggests you eat a cracker.

Svetlana sucks.

Zach's alright and my original frat boy impression of John is on point, but Janelle seems to be a lot nicer than I expected her to be. My only suggestion would be not to sit on the edge of the couch giving America a far too wide view of her thighs. You're a pretty girl Janelle, but please remember that we are watching.

Another sickeningly cast of good looking people graced the small screen last night with the premiere of "8th & Ocean." I think we're looking at a one-hit wonder here. It'll have a decent following, but nothing of the cult following of "Laguna Beach" and MTV will eventually decide not to renew it for a second season.

From what I gather so far, Kelly is evil and I feel really bad for her sister Sabrina. Britt is the girl next door soon to be girl gone wild. (I'm sorry but how embarrassing was it when the other models were trying to teach her how to dance? "How do you know how many circles to do?" No one is that lame. Even if you are from Kansas City. It's so prompted I can't even pretend to believe it.) Down the hall in the boys' apartment, the male models eat pizza and do nothing but get paid to look great. All the while the girls have to cut each others throats and aren't even nice. Thanks for sending woman's lib back 10 years MTV. Could you be any more cliche? Girls are mean and will do anything to be on top, but guys are all best buds and don't have to try to be successful. Wow. What a great concept for a show.

What do I think, MTV? Downgrade.

I might miss the finale of "Project Runway." [gasp] If you tell me who won before I get to see it I will ruin you.

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"You don't even know the difference between right and wrong's just sad"