Saturday, November 17

The Real World...if we were all slutty and passive aggressive

uhh I'm completely unmotivated to do anything. I totally don't feel like going out this weekend, I don't know why. This is my pre-Thanksgiving, post-last week detox. Had a little too much fun last week so relaxing in my freshly cleaned apartment is all that appeals to me.

Fortunately there's an ep of The Real World on right now that I haven't seen yet. This is the first time I've seen Ashli, the Shauvon replacement. Turns out she looks kind of like Kelly Anne and acts just like Trisha, just less trashy. I hate Trasha and I really hope she's not a recurring character on any of the challenges. They're going to have to discontinue those soon because as it is they just use like half of the most recent cast anyway.

Speaking of challenges, challenge queen Coral is doing a pop-up video-esq commentary on the episodes and she is so freakin' funny. CoralVision should be in every Real World episode.

Ashli has already formed a negative opinion about Parisa because the other chicks are chirpin in her ear about how she's a bb. New girl's all jumping on the bandwagon saying Parisa seems isolated, and Kelly Anne, who is actually pretty reasonable most of the time and doesn't talk as much shit as all the other roommates, said Parisa's been like that since the two of them had words on their vacation.

Enter Coral to make the obvious comment, "so she's been isolated since you isolated her." Coral keeps it real at all times...let us take a moment to remember, "I don't wrestle. I beat bitches up."

My other problem with Ashli is that she seems kind of bland. Plus I think she might try to seduce Dunbar...and by try I mean she is definitely doing it. She actually went up to some random girl who was trying to flirt with Dunbar and like told her off. In her confessional she said she loves to compete with other girls and when she wins she knows she's better. Coral's take: "you're not better...you're sluttier. There's a difference."

Ashli and Dunbar go back and forth sounding like their in middle school and Coral just breaks it down. "This is the most boring conversation I've ever heard in my entire fucking life." Everything she says makes me laugh. I need to meet that biotch.

I need to pose a question to the universal to all of you who have seen this episode. When Dunbar's getting all excited when they're talking about sex in the computer room, what does Ashli say she loves? They bleep it out...which can't be good. Whatta ho.

So now let's talk about the deal with Isaac...I am SO confused. Heather called me and I couldn't focus at all because Isaac was saying that he used to do acid, and because of that he has acid flashbacks where he sees birds that aren't there. When he sees a black bird it means someone died? MTV went as far as to edit a fake black bird in the background which was pretty funny. Was he being serious though? Turns out his grandfather died, but I'm still having a really hard time following what went down.

Coral was too because I think she wanted to elaborate on how weird that acid flashback thing really is but Isaac was near tears so she tripped over her words and ended up saying, "I feel bad talking about this I don't think I can make anymore jokes." A bad ass and a truly classy broad all in one. Coral...you're my hero.

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"You don't even know the difference between right and wrong anymore...it's just sad"